Surviving Is Winning, Friend
But everything else isn't bullshit.
Whoosh, it's been a minute since I wrote to you. I mean, I send out newsletters, but it feels like a long time being this intimate. But my friend once said I should STFU and just show up rather than whine about my absence. And I think he's got a point. Even though I haven't been able to bring myself to write.
Credit: @Ebunife
But hey, here I am.
What have you been up to? How's your mind, my friend? Whether you're in Nigeria or not, I want to know.
By the way, if you're new here or have probably come through My Creator's Story series, you're welcome! Grab a chocolate and pass it to your neighbour. And to my day one, wagwan homeboys and girlies!
Back to what I was saying.
How have I been? I have been living and breezing through adulthood. I've laughed, shouted, frowned, been perplexed, and sometimes…just there. I'm living in answered prayers, and I'm still asking for more. I'm grateful for where I am now. It's not exactly what I wanted, but still, I prayed for times like this: a different source of income, even though the economy makes it look futile, with everything FG is doing to its citizens. At the time of writing this, I had to resort to pen and paper first because the national grid fell into its usual sick mode. I digress (what T-pain cannot do, doesn't…)
Do you ever feel like you're just surviving? What do I mean?
You've probably got a well-paying job or business, different streams of income, or maybe enough to sort out your basic needs like me. Yet, it feels like you're caught up in the hustle culture.
Every day you wake up, prepare to hit the street (or you start your day from home and get the job done), go back home, face (Lagos) traffic with different mad people on the road, and get home tired. The next day, the cycle repeats.
If you work from home, you attend meetings upon meetings and get your tasks done till the end of the day. You probably don't know what's happening on your street. So you check your socials to see what's going on. On one end, it feels like you're wasting your time. On the other, you want to be kept abreast of what's happening in the country. It's either sad news or shenanigans from relationship people (and you're very much single) or rinse-and-repeat arguments. So, you close your apps and get back to work.
Perhaps you're a creative doing what you love, but hustling for the next gig to take you out of the trenches and bring you to your dream life. Worse comes to worse; you have a manageable job, but you try to make time to pursue your creative passion.
Whichever category you're in, doesn't it feel like you're just trying to survive? Trying to survive through the next day amidst the plights of the country, light, and network issues. Or you just want to make it through the end of NYSC.
Maybe you can't relate. But if you do, how are you coping? You might even be making enough money but it seems all that's there to the life is hustling. Surviving.
I know life doesn't give a shit about us, and we have to survive regardless of the lemons thrown at us. And so “surviving is everything.” And because I prayed for this moment even though I want more, I have to make it past these stages. I have to survive. Because many things (and lives) depend on that.
But sometimes, it does feel like I don't have a life other than that.
Perhaps it's this adulthood phase that I am right now. Even friendships tend to waver, and you can only catch up with them for a little while before you get back to the hustle. Because you want to be locked in.
Yet, it feels like you're not locked in enough.
Was it ever like this, or is this just our time? (I never really deepened it that I'd have to juggle jobs to survive)
Anyone got an answer? SOS, please.
I'd stop here for a bit. If you can relate, do write back to me or comments. I'd love to hear back from you.
Maybe surviving is winning. But is everything else really bullshit? Because I just don't want to survive. I want to live, too.
Love and Magic,
Damdam.
PS: It's my 30th post! I wanna thank me for supporting me to this one. And for you, for always reading.❤️
Omo, how did we get here??? 🥹
The constant struggle of hustle culture, monotonous work days, Lagos traffic and it’s madness, the economical state of the country, the feeling of having enough but not enough for the current Nigeria!! Infact, I’m confused. Today, I was thinking about the old days (2010s), even if it isn’t so far back, in contrast to the present day it feels like the good ol’ days. I really don’t know how it all changed. 🤦🏽♀️
You see that rinse and repeat cycle that you wrote about- wake up, work, get tasks done, try to catch up on what's going around, put your phone because the news is something else honestly, and just end up getting back to work
Seeeeeeeeeeeee....
This is not life 😞
I mean, there has to be more, right?